August 25, 2011 Health Update

Dear Friends,

Six weeks ago I completed my last chemotherapy infusion for Waldenstrom's Macrglobulenemia and today I had follow-up labs to find out the condition of my blood. Great news! The cancer is in remission and my hemoglobin is "normal"! My IGM is 2058. My weight has been steadily climbing, my energy level is good, and people tell me I look great. So that's that, at least for now and hopefully for years to come. After six months of being tethered to the naugahyde chair in the infusion room, I'm itching to live life fully.

This poem has hung on my bulletin board for years. I'd like to share it with you. It's another one of my favorites and I hope you'll forgive me if I've already shared it in an earlier Update.

You Reading This, Be Ready
by William Stafford

Starting here, what do you want to remember?

How sunlight creeps along a shining floor?

What scent of old wood hovers, what softened

sound from outside fills the air?

Will you ever bring a better gift for the world

than the breathing respect that you carry

wherever you go right now? Are you waiting

for time to show you some better thoughts?

When you turn around, starting here, lift this

new glimpse that you found; carry into evening

all that you want from this day. This interval you spent

reading or hearing this, keep it for life -

What can anyone give you greater than now,

starting here, right in this room, when you turn around?

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When I last wrote to you, I was heading to Portland.  I knew it would be the beginning of a new journey; six months in chemotherapy was a life changing experience and as the weeks and months progressed I grew more and more committed to the concept of being an involved grandparent in Jude and Auggie's lives. The old question, "If not now.....when?" kept bubbling up in my mind. The previous July,  Peter had said, "Mom, I wish you were more involved with the lives of my boys." That sunk deep. Also, over the years, I've been touched by tons of grandparent stories that my students have told. From the day each of my grandsons was born, I've longed to be connected not as a visitor but as a constant in their lives. This year I will be. While in Portland I found a sweet little apartment in the Hollywood District not too close and not too far from Hamblet Street where Jude and Auggie live. I'll be moving up there on September 1st and will figure out what to do after that.  Jim and I did something similar to this back in 1991 when I moved to Ashland to teach for a year. This year he and Gretchen will remain in Ashland but I'm sure we'll all be putting in a fair amount of time behind the wheel on I-5 so we can stay in touch. For the retirees in the family, that's easy, but I hate the thought of being away from Gretchen, Tom, and Bleu who have been my rock and great supporters during these difficult times. It's the old pebble in the pond again...when one person makes a move, the ripples interrupt all who share the pond. But as we've always done before, we'll figure out new ways to stay connected and I look forward to becoming a Portlander and sharing it when friends and relatives come up to visit.

Just last week, Gretchen, Tom, Bleu and I shared a sweet cabin on the Oregon Coast for a week. Gretchen took a watercolor workshop while Tom, Bleu and I enjoyed time off! I'm gonna miss them!

"When you're on a journey, and the end keeps getting further and further away, then you realize that the real end IS the journey." Karlfried Graf Durckheim

"Why Portland?" you might ask.


Cascade Head is an easy hour and a half drive away. Not a bad reward for an easy hike!

Friends like to come and visit Portland and stay for a sleep-over!

The most creative dressers in the world live right there in NE Portland! Check them out!

You can't beat the ceasar salads in The Pearl!

Fairies live in Portland!

Our son Peter and his wife Hope live in Portland!

When Uncle Don came to visit, we spent a full day riding the great public transportation. This is in front of the tram high above the city.

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Today I was avoiding the heat by hanging out at Barnes and Noble. A friend suggested I read The Art of Pilgrimage by Phil Cousineau and The Power of Myth by Joseph Campbell. While perusing The Power of Myth, I came across this.

"If you realize the real problem is~~ losing yourself, giving yourself to some higher end, or to another~~you realize this itself is the ultimate trial. When we quit thinking about ourselves and our own self-preservation, we undergo a truly heroic transformation of consciousness~~~You have been thinking one way, you now have to think a different way." 

I'm not so sure I'm thinking a different way, but I do know I want to lose myself and weave into the lives of others in my new Portland scene. Along with being an active Granny, I plan to volunteer in Jude and August's schools. I also hope to be able to run writers' workshops in the women's prison just a little south of Portland. Fortunately, I have some very special old friends in Portland and I am looking forward to having more time with them. 

Deb and I taught together at Central Howell School for eight years. She is indeed a dear old 

friend!

So that's my news, and I look forward to hearing yours! Please stay in touch and send me your creative masterpieces and your unique thoughts. They are what sustained me for six months and I'll need them on this new road as well.

I hope you've had a wonderful summer. Please tell me about a moment that was memorable for some reason. I'm a story addict! 

As is my tradition, I'll not take time to revise or edit this...it's bedtime (earlier now that I don't have dexamethasone to keep me flyin'!) and so off it goes.

With love and best wishes to each of you,

Ruth